Part 94-The Engagement Part 1

As narrated by Nemo

Riza’s house was jumping! I didn’t know that he had so many relatives or maybe his mother just “hired” a whole lot of people to make their house look full:-p

This braai was so big-one would have thought he was getting married and not engaged! I walked around filling up the almost empty platters with “hot hot” braaied meat. Yoh these aunties could chow!!

Aunty who I didn’t know: bring some burnt chops for me (with her mouth full) I like them burnt and crispy!

I wanted to shove this whole piece of texan steak into her already stuffed mouth! Her plate was literally overflowing and she wanted more!! And she didn’t exactly look like she had just flown in from Somalia, NOOOO, she looked liked she was a Sumo wrestler who had just been carried by the world’s largest crane directly from Japan!

Me: (in my most polite tone) jee I will

And as I waited by the braai stand for Riza’s cousins to burn those damn chops…a wicked thought entered my mind and I couldn’t help but smirk;)

Me: (to Riza’s cousin Amien) who’s that aunty over there?

Amien: eish that one is not my aunty..she’s Riza’s moms sister in laws some connection…major pain! Stay far from her!

Me: well she’s the one who wanted the burnt chops…

And Amien looked at me with a very similar grin on his face…

Amien: I’ll be right back!

And true to his word he was back in a jiffy! With a bottle of what looked like ground red chillies! Oh hell no! You go bro!!

Amien: don’t say a word

Me: my lips are sealed

And he basted those chops in the chillies and put them back onto the braaistand!!

I walked back to the Aunty with a huge smile. It seemed I wasn’t the only one with tricks up my sleeve*wink*

Me: here you go

Aunty: bring some wors one time!

Me: blerry hell!

Aunty: what you said?

Me: I said…sure no problem:)

And I walked towards the guys sitting together. To hell with her wors!

While chatting to Riza and his cousins-I couldn’t help but notice her enter the huge white tent…and I walked up to her…

Me: hey sexy lady (wrapping my arm around her)

Her: my handsome! (And she kissed me on my cheek)

Me: I have missed you so much! I missed your pretty smile and your beautiful eyes…(And I squeezed her tighter)

Her: (chuckling to herself and before she could speak…Riza stood on the other side of her and linked his arm in hers)

Riza: sorry Nemo she’s all mine!

Her: you are getting engaged tomorrow so your party is over

Riza: that’s tomorrow…now I’m still “single” beautiful (and he kissed her cheek) Laeeka is no match with you at all!

Her: (with a soft laugh) bachoos…yourl are tooo naughty little shaytaans!

Nemo: whaaaat Dadi? You know we love you so much:)

Dadi: I love you both also…bachoo (and she held Riza’s face emotionally) you were so small when I first saw you…just now you will get married (tears of joy I’m sure, rolled down her cheeks) you won’t forget your dadi?

Riza: (kissing Dadi’s hand) never! You are my first girlfriend Dadi

And both of us hugged her. In the time when I had my “episodes” Dadi would come and sit with me the whole day, she would read with me, talk to me. I started seeing life from a very different angle because of her. My own Dadi was very sweet but I hardly saw her…but this cute Dadi here more than made up for the loss.

After we walked Dadi to a table…I heard a shout

“It was him!!” And suddenly everyone turned and looked at me!!

Me: what?

Sumo Aunty: he did something to the chops!! It’s because of him I can’t enjoy the braai-ever since he gave me those chops I’ve been to the toilet five times already!!

Woman you don’t need a toilet, you kinda need a drum!

Me: I don’t follow you Aunty what are you talking about?

Sumo Aunty: what did you do to those chops?

Me: I took them to the braai stand, put them there, waited until they were burnt and brought them back to you

Riza’s Mum: now now Naeem wouldn’t do what you are implying that he did, it must have gotten mixed up with the spicy lot of chops

And the Sumo wrestler stomped off in a huff! Riza had noticed Amien and Hussain(his other cousin) laughing amongst themselves and he suppressed his laugh!

Dadi: good she deserves it! I never ever liked her!

Me: you are my rockstar you know that Dadi

Dadi: and you are my cutypie ℓ☺ℓ

Riza and I looked at each other..

Riza: did you just say ℓ☺ℓ Dadi?

Dadi: jee bachoo, you don’t know what is ℓ☺ℓ?

Riza: (laughing) we do but how do you know?

Dadi: I’m sharp like that (and she winked at us)

—————————
The night went on and the noise and fun never stopped! Mari seemed to be enjoying herself with the girls, they were putting mehndi…which reminded me…our girls were putting mehndi too!

Me: Reez we gotto sneak in to Laeeka’s place bro

Reez: (looking excited but acting calm) my mother may just kill me…but…let’s make a plan

It wasn’t hard getting out, not with so many people around;) all I wanted was to see Aara with mehndi on her hands…

Reez: (on his phone) bro we need your help

Zoheb: sure what’s up?

Reez: we are coming over…make a plan for us not to get seen

Zoheb: so impatient huh..and you’re getting engaged tomorrow…don’t worry, phone me when you’re outside I’ll sort it out

…..

Zoheb walked towards our car and once Riza got off, he handed him his car keys.

Riza: why keys?

Zoheb: because that’s where she’s waiting for you…20 minutes bro that’s all the time I could buy

Riza: thanks bro (and he patted Zoheb’s back and got into Zoheb’s car and drove off)

Me: that was smooth!

Zoheb: (ℓ☺ℓ) come on let’s go inside..how’s the braai going on your side?

Me: huge…too many people infact…and here, how are things here?

Zoheb: .going good although I’m over stuffed! All these aunties seem to think I have never eaten in my life!

Me: (laughing) welcome to our world! This is going to be a little hard because once I get in I won’t be able to come out easily…

Laeeka’s house was also so full! People all over! Did they also really know so many people??

Where is she????please let me find her before someone calls me!!!!

I saw Zainab…but where was Aara?

Me: any idea where’s Aara?

Zoheb: yep follow me

And he led me upstairs to a closed room…and I heard her voice

Aara: what took you so long? You fed me only one burfee and then you ran away!

Zoheb:(whispering) sorry…Reez wanted to see Laeeka and someone wanted to see you..

And she looked at me…

Aara: Nemo!!! (With a huge smile on her face)

Me: hey sweetheart…let me see your mehndi

And she put her hands forward to show me while Zoheb hopped onto the bed and sat next to her

Zoheb: shhhh he’s sleeping (and he pointed at Laeeka’s cousins baby fast asleep in her little cot) here (and he fed her a burfee)

I suddenly felt like an intruder as I watched Zoheb feed her…he brought the burfee close to her mouth then pulled it away and she playfully scolded him. I felt awkward. I felt uneasy.

Aara: sit down Nemo

Me: I’ve got to go just now anyway…Reez will be back soon

Aara: oh just sit man…I need to tell you something

So I complied.

Aara: Zainab’s parents found a boy for her and she didn’t tell them about Arshad yet!

Me: huh? When did that happen? She never said anything!

Aara: she told me yesterday and we can’t exactly tell Arshad anything yet

Me: I spoke to him earlier…he’s driving back tomorrow morning to make it for the engagement. Parents are still staying in Zeerust..(Running my hands through my hair) Zainab Zainab Zainab…we’ll have to do something

Zainab: (walking into the room) have to do what?

Me: You! I feel like strangling you now!

Zainab: (sitting next to me) help me Nemo..I’m not like you all..I couldn’t say anything ( and she burst out crying)

Me: heyyyy (side hugging her) we’ll work it out okay don’t cry…it’s not like they can force you to marry someone who you don’t want to

Zainab: (sobbing) you know how my father is Nemo..once his mind is made up there’s no going back

Me: shhhh…you love Arshoo…and you will marry him only…even if we have to make you elope and get married (and I winked at her)

Zainab: (crying even more) I don’t want to run away and get married…I want Arshad to be accepted by my family

Me: okay okay (looking at Aara and Zoheb) tell you what, once the engagement is over, ask this guy to meet all of us and we’ll explain to him that you’re in love with someone else…we are not in an old indian movie…its 2014…I’m sure this guy will understand and well, if he doesn’t then we have our ways to make him understand!

Zoheb: (with a side smile) I like the sound of that!

Me: see we are all here for you…and tomorrow your jaanu will be here too

Aara: sorry Zai..(Pouty face) I shouldn’t have scolded you…

Me: (ℓ☺ℓ) you scolded her???

Aara: I can’t even cover my face right now…(ℓ☺ℓ) but I scolded her…sorry Zai I’m sooooo sorry

Zai: its okay Aara…I know you meant well…and thanks Zoheb for your encouragement earlier as well….I’m so happy that I have all of you it really means a lot

Me: Zai Zai no more crying now okay…we’ve got your back (and I side hugged her again)

And I think we were making too much noise because the baby woke up and started howling his little lungs out!!!

Aara: pick him up one of you!

Me: how???? He’s so little what if I drop him!

Aara: (raising her eyebrow) you can carry me but you can’t carry a small baby?

Me: that’s different! (And this baby continued crying as Zoheb and I stared into his cot -what a little monster)

Zoheb: I’ll hold the legs you hold the head

Me: you hold the head I’ll hold the legs

Aara: unbelievable! he’s crying man get on with it already!

So Zoheb and I helped each other carry this tiny baby…ℓ☺ℓ ..two grown men helping each other carry a baby (hide)

Aara: lift him up against you Nemo

Me: you mean lift him up against you ZOHEB?

Aara: guys!

Me: okay okay( and Zoheb helped me put the baby upright and I patted his back)..don’t move your hand bro hold his head

Zoheb: (twitching his nose) what’s that smell?

Me: (I could smell it too) oh no…oh no…oh hell no! Did this kid shit???

Aara and Zainab were torn with laughter!

Me: bro go call someone please

Aara: (with that wicked Aara grin) no…you both will change the diaper…almost all the ladies have mehndi on and you can’t just let the child cry like this change him!

Zoheb: I don’t know how to change a diaper!

Aara: no problem..I’ll talk you through it :-p

This woman had a way with words for sure!! She had made us put the nappy mat or whatever it was on the bed, lay out a nappy,wetwipes and bum cream! She was frikking crazy!

Me: here you do the honours (to Zoheb)

Zoheb: (looking at Aara) uh uh

Aara: zoheb!

Zoheb: uuuurrrgh Nemo just have that clean nappy ready( and he opened the nappy)

And both of us jumped back in horror!!! Awful! Awful! Awful! Was this a human baby or a baby dinosaur!!!

The baby found it so amusing that he too started laughing!

Zoheb: I cannot clean that!! (And he shoved the wetwipes into my hand)

Me: I have arthritis(lmao)…you do it (shoving the wetwipes back to Zoheb)

Zainab: guys its a small baby come on grow up already! And Nemo since when do you have arthritis and what does it have to do with changing a nappy?

Me: (to Zoheb) we do this together

And we walked towards the baby like two men on the mission of a lifetime!

I held the baby’s legs up and Zoheb wiped up the mess with so many wetwipes in his hand that I think he finished the whole lot on that one nappy change!

And we looked at this now happy baby smiling at us and suddenly it didn’t feel so bad after all…I mean we would have to do this one day for our kids just like our parents did it for us….okay no scrap that thought- we’ll hire a maid just to change the nappies! :-p

My thoughts were disturbed by the sound of my phone ringing…flip…it was Riza’s mother!

Me: hello?

Riza’s mum: Naeem is Riza with you?

Me: errr not at the moment…he’s in the toilet

Riza’s mum: is he at Laeeka’s house?

Me: no…we just came to the garage for something

Riza’s mum: okay I’ll hold on while he gets back

Me: my battery is really low and may die any minute

Riza’s mum: if I find out that you boys are lying to me, I promise you Naeem I will not hesitate to break this engagement! Because your car was seen parked outside Laeeka’s house now!

Me:(shux) ofcourse it’s parked there…I have Zoheb’s car he’s using mine

Riza’s mum: I need you both back here in 5 minutes, otherwise I’m coming to Laeeka’s house (and she cut the call)

Me: f***…we need to go this woman is nuts she’s probably already on her way here…(Dialing Riza) bro.. Back of the house now-your mother is on her way!

——————————————————–
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24 thoughts on “Part 94-The Engagement Part 1

  1. OMW! #ripped
    I can’t stop laughing after the nappy episode! =D =D
    Always look forward to your posts…love them 😛
    xoxo

    Like

  2. This post rockss!!!!

    Neemo… Chops….. Wrestler….
    Hªª=)) hªª=)) hªª=))

    Zoheib and Neemo!!! All the way!!!!
    Changing nappy…. ℓ☺ℓ ℓ☺ℓ ℓ☺ℓ

    Riza & Laeeka
    Arshad & Zainub

    Like

  3. Lmao!! Nemo n Zoheb tryn t chnge nappies!! Ripped!! Lol ohh gosh riza ur mums a terror man!! Shooohhh I feel sorry for laeeka! Awww I feel soo sorry fr nemo havn t see zoheb feedn aara 😦 myb thts aaras n zohebs plan,let nemo realise hs feelngs fr Aara so he’l do sumtn 😛

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  4. Totally ripped😊! These guys are too much! Nemo come on now u gotta tell Aara how u feel what’s taking u so long and how come Zoheb and Aara are some much time together ( not fair)😞! But still enjoying the story! Great work

    Like

  5. Shazıa please tell us n save ıs the hearbreak ıs aara n zoheb gona b 2gther coz ıt sure looks lıke that they 4ever 2gther ın almost every post n poor nemo ıs 4ever on the opp end!how sad *cryıng*buuuut enjoyed the other parts u got a real good way wıth words

    Like

    • ℓ☺ℓ what wud be so bad about them being together?

      Ok since u asked so nicely, here’s what’s going to happen-hope its not too much heartbreak

      Zoheb and Aara are NOT going to end up together….

      Aara and Nemo are NOT going to end up together…

      Nemo and Zoheb ARE going to end up together yayyyyyyayyyy wooohooo *happy dance*
      Nemo is going to realise that he was just jealous coz Zoheb was spending so much time with Aara and he was missing him so much! I mean why should Zoheb feed Aara and not him neh?not fair at all*folded arms*

      And Aara…she’s going to marry a millionaire oil sheikh from dubai and live happily ever after :-p

      Like

      • #Ripped #bust #Lmao They make a goood team not couple 😛
        Bt I like hw u replied =)) … had me laughing like crazy =)) !!

        Like

      • Lol TOP response….t suspense is gr8 & whoever ends up wid Aara will neva change t fact that this is an amazing story👍

        Like

  6. Rotfl! Haahaahaahaahaa#Ripped.
    Chillie chops,Neemo & Zoheb changin nappy.
    Daadi is soo cute ℓ☺ℓ!
    Zoheb feedin Aara burfee ,too adorable! Hp Zainab sorts herself out b4 upsettin Arshad. Gr8 stuff!!!

    Like

  7. 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃 loved this post 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃
    ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
    Amazing work, shazia.

    Like

  8. Amaaazzziiinnggg post 😀 !!!!! Dadi sounds awesomeeee lol … like one of the modern dadi’s :p . “Woman you don’t need a toilet, you kinda need a drum!” …. #Ripped … I almost choked on my bubblegum =)) and what the heck is wrong with Riza’s mother ?!?!?! Is she human or alien !?!? Lmao . She’s really weird !! May Allah save all girls from having a monster-in-law 😉

    Like

  9. 😁😃😂😅😄 nemo and zoheb you 2 rock. Never a dull moment with the 2 of you.
    They guys always there for each other

    Like

  10. Nemo u gooood 😉 reaaaal gooood 😛 !! #BeyondRipped #Bust #Lmao
    Suma wrestler deserved that for being greedy =)) “u dnt need a toilet… u kinda need a drum” #Ripped =)) =D =)) !! High_5 Nemo & Amien 😀 !!
    ​​Nemo & Dadii are tooo cute #Ripped !! Did he jus call her sexy lady *laughing like crazy* !! Eh Nemo u crazyyyy bro =)) and Dadii still calls u her handsome! #Ripped =)) Dadii is to0o cute…she even sez “Lol” and she winks #Ripped !!

    Ooh tym for escaping 😉 …. Aww Aara looks cute with her mendhi *eye lashes* but Ouch *cringe* …. Zoheb feeding Aara burfee and making Nemo feel awarkward -_- !! Not cool 😦 !! Awww Nemo is super duper sweet *love struck* he’s always ready to make a plan for his friends 😀 … he helped Arshad now gonna help Reez then Zai *dancing face*!! Even tho they a bit errr with him… his still ready to help them and he has their backs 😀 #GottaLoveNemo♡

    The Springroll on top 😛 ….. Nemo & Zoheb changing the Diaper #Ripped lmao two men on a mission #bust they cudnt even carry the kid #Ripped Ehh they definitely make a awesome team 😛 !! *holds my tommy and wipes my tears* this whole post had me ripping #lovedIt 😀 bt …. *fingers crossed* … they better get back to Reez house in like the speed of lightening 😛 xoxo

    Like

  11. LMAO
    u got me into a fit of laughter with da nappy changing session.
    keep up this amaaazing workk!!!!!
    hoping for another awesome post soon, just cant get enough!

    Like

  12. #Nemo+Zoheb chngin nappie hahaha ToOooo FuNNy!!!had me in stitches…. NeMo I Feel d pain Aara+Zoheb Always put u thru ,if Only Aara cud see it tooooo!!!Cumon tel her hw u Feel Already!!!Awesomely FuNny PoSt…
    #NEMO Fan 4eva!!!

    Like

  13. Uhh mahn how cud I forget 😛 ….. Nemo put his hands through his hair #UzziStyle *love struck*!! Nemo jus gets more awesome as the posts go 😀

    Like

  14. LMAO!!! That post was awesomeee!!!! #ripped “And both of us jumped back in horror!!! Awful! Awful! Awful! Was this a human baby or a baby dinosaur!!!” This was just tooo funny!!@Haaj #UzziStyle yep but he doesn’t beat Uzair Bobat lol. I miss DOAD so much *sigh*.

    Like

  15. Aggh. “Our girls”? Sorry Nemo. Aara is NOT your girl! You guys are friends! And Zoheb is feeding Aara because she can’t eat with her mendhi hands and she likes to eat! So mind your own business and people stop getting so excited and saying its a plan to get them together because it could be a plan to let Nemo know he is a friend and must stay a friend. Or it could be no plan at all and Zoheb and Aara just have that natural spark? And oh my gosh! Someone do me a favour and just slap Reeza’s stupid mother across the face! Witch! I hate her! Poor Laeeka! Zainab stupid ! Go tell your parents! Nemo! Go for Mari! I don’t like the detective guy. Shame I feel bad for the sumo lady,couldn’t enjoy the braai 😦 see now im commenting long long things like haaj! Ey haaj you too! Bad influence! Bye.

    Like

  16. The whole Nemo and Aara thing is kind of cliche. In every hindi movie a childhood friend wants the girl! Blogs such as relatable 101 , Diary of a Dubain and xoxomemongirl are so refreshing because Zidane and Amaani are just friends and dont even Think that way,taariq and yasmin hang out without any of those feelings and Rayhaan and Farah are friends with not even a thought of them being together not even from parents because they know they’re friends.

    Like

    • This is not a reply to this comment in particular-but to the one that I didn’t approve-you know who you are- vulgar language will NOT be tolerated on the comments!!! Character bashing will get you no where, it’s a story, if you don’t like it- DON’T READ IT!

      Like

  17. @Humi I miss DOAD too 😦 … lol Nemo is tooo goood 😛 … I looove him :”)
    @Zoheb 😉 Huh uh jus say my awesome effect is falling on u 😛 jokes errrm I guess u got the feeling of hw its hard to shush 😛 !! As for Zoheb and Aara …..nah uh never days 😛 it’s jus a phase 😉 Nemo and Aara forever 😀

    @Relatable101forLife …. LOL if that’s refreshing at least it’s keeping u refreshed and happy 😛 but Life love destiny is different 😀 !! Nemo & Aara gotta be together #Hope&Duas 😛
    Lol Tariq loved Yasmeen =)) the things he did made it obvious he loved her and that’s a undeniably fact 😛 … btw Zah was Yas childhood friend 😀 …
    Lol are u fearing that Nemo and Aara will end up together even though Zoheb and her seem like they love each uda -_- ? Hell yeah Nemo gotta have Aara 😀

    @HaajFanNumber2 Lol Thanks 😛 bt u dnt have to put that name =)) X_x
    @Molly Lol noo fyts are nt cool….. -_- we shall agree to disagree 😛

    Like

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