As narrated by Nemo:
A rainy day for a change…and rainy days always brought back memories of our treehouse. I sat at the window and stared outside for how long,I don’t even know. It was Arshad’s turn to “babysit” me and Aara said she would be late. Eight months into rehabilitation and going strong.
Arshad was fast asleep on the couch and I knew he had hidden the house keys somewhere-not that I planned on running away again. These guys were just awesome…giving me their time and support meant a lot to me.
I found myself infront of Aara’s bookshelf. Yes, I would force myself to read after years:-p
After browsing through so many books, I stopped on one…and as I opened it to start reading, a page fell out.
“What is this?” I asked in my mind…
I was instantly drawn to the words of this poem written in Aara’s handwriting…a poem she hadn’t completed.
So I made myself comfortable back by the window and held the pen in my hand and closed my eyes….
Within seconds…memories of Aara filled my mind…Aara laughing,crying, singing,jumping on my bed,stealing my lunch, scaring me, kissing my forehead, boxing me…and all at once the questions that were in my mind for the past few weeks seemed to be answered…whenever I looked at her recently I felt self conscious..I would button up my shirt and make sure my laces were tied..I would look at myself in the mirror first before I came infront of her, I would hang onto every word that she said…and I never did this before..
I could feel my cheeks turn pink whenever she came infront of me..what was going on???
I opened my eyes and smiled involuntarily…yet she wasn’t there she was still infront of me, looking at me…
And I started writing were she had left off…my heart beating violently at the realization that had just dawned upon me….I was in love!! I was in love!!
And I wasn’t about to give it up….
I’m not blind. I can see what’s happening. Aara has a bounce in her step and a glow on her face…I’ve known her since childhood how could I not notice?
Am I pretending not to see? Yes and No
Zoheb likes her, that much I do know. And maybe Aara likes him too…but love…no, it can’t be love at all.
Everytime I wanted to tell her…I held back because of the many times I had hurt her…and recently so much just kept coming up. Aadil was also in the picture and that too because of me.
Different scenarios play out in my head all the time…
Me: I love you…
Aara: I know how, I love you too!
Me: no I mean…I love you love you…I’m in love with you Aara
And she goes away from me…in shock and anger and I lose not only my love but my best friend too…
Me: I’m in love with you Aara…
Aara: (tears in her eyes and hugging me) I love you Nemo…I’ve loved you forever
And she stays with me…for the rest of my life
Either one of the two can happen…I had a lot to gain and a lot to lose too.
I saw how comfortable she was with Zoheb, the way she ate from his food, the way she spoke to him with so much ease…the way she looked at herself in the mirror before he entered a room, the way she gave him more attention than anyone else. It hurt. A lot.
It probably hurt her too when I used to hang out with different girls…back then when I didn’t know that she was in love with me and now when she doesn’t know that I am in love with her…
It was so ironic…I fell in love with her when she had given up on having a future with me…in that way.
If I could turn back the hands of time I would do so in the blink of an eye. If I could take back all the times I had hurt her, I would. And if I look back at my life the only consistency was Aara..
She lit up my whole life with her contagious smile…
I am alive today because of her, I am healthy today because of her…my every breath belongs to her
Aara and I belonged together and I was going to tell her in Durban where I had everything planned out…a perfect surprise, one that she’s always talked about.
Even if she does like Zoheb, they aren’t married I still have hope and a lifetime of memories behind me…