Part 200 – Words Of Encouragement…

As narrated by Riza

Despite the 15 long days of waiting, I kept reminding myself that it could have been much worse.

I had “told” Aara all about my mother’s acceptance of Laeeka, our wedding that was back on track and how much we both wanted her here with us.

“You received this letter a few days ago A. ..and I know that you wouldn’t mind if I read it out to you…it’s from Uzair. …”

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Dear Aara

Why is it that you always make it seem like I do so much more than I actually do? The little that I do is what makes me feel like I have a purpose when I wake up every morning.

And why is that you put your self down all the time, making it seem like you have always screwed up in life?
Save the regret for your old age, or never! Right now, these are your roaring twenties, the time in your life where you figure out who you are, who you want to be and what life you want to lead for however much time you have on this Earth.

Yet it seems that what you have been dealt with in this life has caused you much pain and sorrow and so instead of embracing your twenties, you are shutting down, breaking down…

My dear Aara, everything in life happens out of God’s will, out of his knowledge. There is no denying that out of all the people I know, you are one who has been tested at every stage in your life. Through your years at university, Nemo was your test; your friendship, your loyalty, it was tested again and again. It moulded you and shaped you into the person you are today.

Countless other events have tested you; Aadil, Nemo’s parents, especially his father. Again and again you have been tested, and more times than I can count you have come out the other end stronger. But everyone does have their breaking point, a point in their life where they just shut down even if its for a single moment, for a day, for a week or even for a month.

So break down Aara. Let the pain consume you, drown in it if you must, but don’t lose your self in the process. Don’t let the pain pull you down to the pits of the sea. Instead, fight. Fight for that breathe of air and find your way back to shore.

The last time I was with you, I hadn’t realised you were this lost in life Aaroo. I figured that Zoheb would be the answer to your problems, that love would rule over all other sorrows and bad past memories. Alas, I was wrong.

How can you love someone else when you don’t love yourself?

And yes, I really will lecture you about self love! Its not that you hate your self and that you’re suicidal. Heavens that is not the case.

But you’re beating your self up for all the reasons that one shouldn’t. I wont start listing the reasons otherwise we shall be here all day, and my candle slowly becomes smaller and smaller as I continue writing which signals my night has come to an end. But before that,I want you to breathe!

Just take a deep breathe in and realise one single, sole thing.

You are human.

You are only capable of so much, and being strong for everyone around you is one of the most amazing traits you have. But at the same time, it takes a toll on a person. And here you are, pouring your heart out to me on a now crumpled sheet of paper and sometimes I feel like, why do you not express these feelings to the man you want to spend the rest of your life with?

Don’t for a second think that this is a burden in anyway. I feel honoured that you turn to me and trust me, and I understand from what you have said that Zoheb has somehow hurt you. You don’t wish to speak about it and I will respect that because at the end of the day, why dwell on the bad when there is so much more goodness in this world!

But Aara, and you know this because I am always saying it, you have to communicate. You have to communicate these feelings of anger and sorrow and pain and everything in between instead of sitting and eating Magnum, which I now crave for so thank you for that.

Zoheb aside, you need to come to terms with who you are, who you want to be and where you want to go in life.

There will come a time when life will become so hectic that you will need to start allowing others to be strong for you; you will have to stop being strong for everyone else. And now I am just rambling on because there is so much I want to say and my focus keeps shifting so I apologise if you get confused and I apologise if this doesn’t make sense.

You need to start loving your self, trusting your self, knowing who you are. Whatever tweedle dum and tweedle dee (Zoheb and Nemo) have done, that is just a bump in the road, small or big, its a bump. And you’re Aara. I know you’re strong and I know you will find a way of not drowning in this loneliness. You will come up for air kicking and laughing.

As for what you say about change, change is constant, It is something that makes life LIFE. We can’t stop change, it happens knowingly and unknowingly . It happens blatantly and in small ways. It happens.

The people we meet, the places we go, it changes us whether we like it or not.

I wish you good luck with your endeavour with the Amreen Vawda case. Stay safe Aara, stay happy and be content.

Uzair

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“Your parents have tried contacting him but he has since moved from the town from where he mailed this letter…but knowing Uzair, his duas are with you no matter where he is “, I said softly

“You know Aara, this is ironic…This letter was sent when all this drama began and Uzair had no idea about this situation. ..when he says break down no matter how long it takes. ..I think that you’re there now. And well, I am patiently waiting for the day when you come up kicking and laughing “, I said as a smile crept up across my face.

Everything, no matter how good or bad, happens for a reason.

And the slightly increased beeping on the heart monitor made me realise that she knew it too…

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200 Episodes! Wow, that’s nice :-p I just realised that now while putting up this post:)

A HUGE THANK YOU to the lovely Tasmiyah for the heart touching letter from Uzair…for your time, for your effort, for always helping…especially since you’re in the middle of exams. Thank You SO much! Hope that the rest of your exams go smoothly and wish you every success ~Ameen…mwah luv u:)